Blogging Blah Blah and Being an Oddball

I haven't been a very good blogger lately have I? Well, maybe I've never been a very good blogger, but I haven't been a very productive blogger. It can be fun in a way, writing down your thoughts and having the ability to share and to see what others think, that bit is fun. It seems as though within the last few years everyone has decided to be a blogger. Fair enough, everyone has an opinion, and ideas and we all like to share and communicate. Now that things like facebook and twitter have become more than just a diversion or a bit of a treat they seem to have morphed into our daily process of interacting with others. They feel like a necessity. Up in the morning, have your cup of coffee or however it is you start your day and then right to the device to check up on your facebook. Lunchtime, check your facebook. Home from work..facebook. Ooops my phone dinged, someone replied on facebook, better see what that's about. And all of a sudden the world is awash with our thoughts, ideas and opinions. It's all out there, forever. Every bad mood, every little disagreement, every lunch someone ordered at the deli, every latte at Starbucks, every cute face your dog made (guilty) you get the point, it's almost like why have a blog when our lives are moment by moment recorded, out on display, reviewed and critiqued every day?
Of course there are many brilliant minds and amazing writers who do have blogs worth reading. Why bother trying to get published in an industry that is overwhelmed and frankly probably highly controlled for content? Write a blog.
Then there are people who really, really just like to hear themselves talk, no shortage of those, and they can reach a much larger audience with a blog. Why limit your rants to friends and family who have all heard what you have to say a zillion times?
I am fascinated by how different the world is for young people who have always had the internet. And smartphones. For them instant communication with a relatively unlimited audience is just the way things are. They can't imagine having to wait to use a telephone to confess some deep dark secret or some bit of exciting news to their best friend. Or having to wait for a piece of mail to arrive in response to a letter you sent a week earlier. Or the intimacy of the sweaty piece of paper cautiously being unwrapped while hiding in the bathroom stall at school awaiting the answer to the big question 'do you like me?'
I'm only a bit nostalgic for those times. Really I thrive on the ability to be able to have instant responses. I'm thrilled by the fact that some of the people I have the most stimulating conversations with are people I would never have known before the internet, and who I may never meet in person. I care about these people and I know they care about me. I've always been a bit of an oddball and good friends are hard to come by. I think many of the people I've grown close to online are cut from the same cloth. When I was so sick and miserable on treatment for Hepatitis C I found groups and individuals who offered real support and understanding because they knew exactly what I was experiencing. It was a wider base than I could have had access to by going to the one and only support group that was offered in town and consisted of about 20 people at best. In my experience, being an oddball, in a group that size I'm lucky to find one or two who really clicks with all of the aspects of my life not just the topic of the group.
So ok, I've been an inconsistent blogger. I won't say bad, I won't say great, I just am who I am, quirky, oddball, whatever. I am a voracious communicator, although I'm not even sure 'voracious' fits in that context, but it's my blog so I'm using it that way. And isn't that the beauty of all this. We can do it our way, so long as we're not claiming to be experts or speaking on a topic that requires study and expertise. If I am an expert in anything it's doing things in my own oddball way and encouraging others to embrace their own eccentricities. So this post is dedicated to all my friends, near and far, in person and online, I am so grateful for you all and for your humor, honesty and courage to be yourselves! Thank you for being you.

Peace and Love,
Jenny

© 2010-2014 Nanakoosa’s Place, authored by Jennifer Hazard

We are the Messengers

By now most of us have become aware that conditions in our world are rapidly changing. Not only in politics and economics but in the Earth herself. We have seen an increase in severe weather patterns, earthquakes, and other phenomenon. The events are most likely due to our ongoing abuse and manipulation of the planet and her resources. Politically  there are uprisings around the globe, in response to the abuse and manipulation of human beings as resources. Here in the US there have been rallies, demonstrations, recall efforts and occupations of  government buildings by citizens who demand fair and proper representation.The nation is now more than ever at the mercy of the abusers and manipulators, many who appear to be blind to the needs of the rest of us. Even in the face of public outcry, many of those who wield the power and control appear unfazed by objections to their myopic policies.

Sometimes it feels like it’s all too much to take in. While I follow events closely on a daily basis mostly via non commercial sources like blogs, twitter, independent news sources and the WisEye* legislative coverage I find myself needing, and deserving, an information holiday from time to time. As much as I advocate for an informed community I also realize that keeping track of events is hard work and I encourage others to take occasional breaks as well. As with any other job our productivity is increased when we are given the opportunity to rest, play and manage self care. And like any vacation, sometimes it can be difficult to return to the real world of work. But we do because we know our work is essential, meaningful and necessary.

We do not check in. punch a time clock or report to a supervisor. We do not accrue benefits or bring home a paycheck or gain promotions; we work for a greater goal than money or security we work for the survival of humanity, for Justice and for Freedom. There are two kinds  of freedom, freedom to and freedom from, this is an important distinction. Many are content to say that we here in America are granted certain freedoms based on our constitution and cultural precedent. We must remain aware of the freedom from. Freedom from censorship, freedom from an oppressive government, freedom from invasions of our privacy and civil rights. The Patriot act, heralded by its creators as policy that would provide freedom from the evil forces of other nations is in reality an open door allowing our own government to restrict our own freedoms, both to and from. Now as the hearings addressing whistle blowing, namely Bradley Manning, are beginning we are at a dangerous juncture where all our freedoms of expression are at risk. If it is decided that speaking the truth about wrongdoings and immoral behavior is a form of treason, what is the next step? I know there is a difference between military information and other forms of public information, but I also know that we are headed down a slippery slope on the path to censorship.

If you need more relevant here and now examples I can tell you that two reporters were arrested at the capitol in Madison during the budget hearings this week (see link for story). This is only one of hundreds of similar cases where attempts to document the reality of the injustices that are taking place have been repressed. These people, the documenters, the messengers, are essential to public awareness of the wrongs that are being committed by our government. As writers and bloggers we also take on the role of messengers, keepers of the history, educators and mobilizers. We have an unprecedented access to collect, document and disseminate information and we need to ensure that we maintain the right to do so.

I don’t care what it is that people chose to blog about, any real life story is an important strand in the fabric of humanity; and it is by maintaining a shared consciousness of humanity that we will remain strong, educated and compassionate as we stand together against oppression and tyranny.

*WisEye

Reporters arrested in Madison

© 2010-2011 Nanakoosa’s Place, authored by Jennifer Hazard

Guest Blogger Eva Day!!!!!!!

 Hello Everyone,

I hope you enjoy this beautifully written and very moving post by Eva Day, Wise Woman Extrodinaire!!!!

Kicking Up The Dust.

Dear Jenny and  female friends.

Jenny is in a phase just now of giving extra focus to political issues in the world around her and the effects of the decisions and oblivion of the "big players" on the lives of ordinary folk and women in the every day world.  I see the care and the commitment in that, from Jenny, and recognise of course that the personal is political and the political is personal.....   we are all part of the world being shaped every day

When I first came across Jenny's blog and a place for "women with a past"," the concept resonated with me immediately.  I imagined wearing my past with pride, like a cloak, perhaps a battered, frayed or somewhat stained one, but well woven and sturdy and richly coloured......   a cloak that trails out behind me, sweeping the dust of the ground as I walk forward, into the future and  - the wisdom of a more mature woman.  Hah!!  But, yes, I do feel after much journeying I know a little, just a little about life, even when paradoxically, it becomes ever more mysterious and perplexing.  And  yes, let's have confidence that we will walk forward boldly into some way of living and being which is forged from wisdom - as well as the good humour and the grace to realise we will also occasionally stumble into wisdom and foolishness too, or be met by it!

Women with a past certainly will stir up an amount of dust as they walk - they do not tread lightly or quietly ,as our foremothers were too often exorted or trained to do, though they may well know how to do so when the circumstances require.  Warrior women can move through the darkness or through difficult terrain with stealth if instinct guides them.... But can also walk like queens, proud and certain when they have heart for their journey.  And the dust?  Well amongst those foremothers told to tread modestly, there have always been those who could not and would not, and they are companions to me.  The dust feels like a pleasing image to me, as what better reminds us of the truth that from the earth we come and to the earth our bodies will return, in one form or another..   ashes to ashes, dust to dust - I can't think of a patriarchal reference that is more female in its symbolism.  Perhaps a little of the dust we raise on our journeys will settle  on the cloaks of other travellers along the way, will blow gently into towns and villages we pass through, will be the form and substance from which daughters, and sons, too, make solid forms: our homes, our pots, our messes, our works of art, the shapes of our lives.   We have touched others, and been touched by them, some of our substance and essence is expressed in their lives of others, just as their lives nourish - or deplete - ours.

When I sense my own past, tune into it with the feeling and instinctive nature, rather than remember specific events and incidents or analyse from a rational sequential viewpoint - then I am in the land of myth and metaphor.  I remember in my bones, and in soul mood... there were hopes and impulses and sudden passionate drives and urges.  There was an absolute will to live, to thrive, to explore, to taste life and to break the rules.  Sometimes because the rules forbade me to do something that called to me more powerful than any social constraints, and sometimes just because the rules needed breaking. Often I was a damned perverse - girl, young woman, slightly older woman who "ought to know better."  And I think I still am all those things and more.........   I have been a daughter  - of two mothers, in my life - and like many reading this am a mother, too.  Like all of us, my past is personal. The particular place I was born, the events that unfolded beyond that, what was done to me and what I did - to life, to myself and others.  Active, passive, many different rhythms.  Never passive for long though, in the rhythm of the passing seasons and years... .. often difficult, hopefully also tender and kind enough to have made somebody's day gentler and more whole from time to time, creative in a playful spirit, destructive at times when wounded, cornered, angry....   Though destruction, too, can be a death and a rebirth, a space for a renewal or new directions. 

Footprints.  That's another picture that comes to my mind's eye.  My footprints, your footprints, and those of the women who walked before us and will come after...  And yes, again, I mention sons too, still believing in a world where boys too, as well as girls,  can be allowed to truly respect their mothers and grandmothers and learn from them - and teach them to.  (If I were a grandma, I'd be quite willing to learn to suck eggs!)  Footprints, also seem somehow a particularly masculine image in our culture.  We tread in the footprints of strong, bold males, in stories and films, don't we?  I would like to feel that our footprints can be trusted  .....  

From one perspective, you may think that I've told you really - nothing - about my own challenges and triumphs - the details - as a woman with a past.  In another sense, I hope you feel I have.  And that you might be like another beautiful piece of fabric or wonderful embroidery on my patchwork cloak..... and I on yours.

Good travelling to all, and my wishes to you for good health, good living and good humour. xx eva

http://eva-everydayadventures.blogspot.com/

(article for International Women's Day is my latest post.)

Image courtesy of
popularchildrenstories.com
© 2011 Nanakoosa’s Place, authored by Jennifer Hazard

I now have a schedule!

I can juggle many projects at once....

Hello friends,

I realized that now that I'm getting serious about this whole project for “Women with a Past” that I’ve been brewing in my cauldron for the past year it’s probably a good idea to create a schedule. This will work for both my benefit (I'm not known for my ability to stay "on task" as they say on report cards) and for the convenience of my readers and contributors. This schedule will commit me to writing, and therefore maintaining focus on my mission, on a daily basis. I know from experience that once one commits their energy and applies consistent effort, magical things can happen. Here's to hoping for lots of Mama Mojo, Women's Wisdom, Survivors Solidarity and Feminine Fierceness.

Here is the schedule:

Monday's Musings and Mish Mosh: my own thoughts and musings, usually focusing on a particular issue or topic. Please feel free to send in suggestions for topics. 

Tuesday’s Tribute: Each Tuesday will feature a bio of a Heroine, past or present, who has stood up for the rights and freedoms of women.

Wednesday's Women’s Wisdom:  Guest posts, artwork, projects and contributions. 

Thursdays Thoughts: Quote for the day, and reflection

Free for All Fridays: Friday is the day to keep it light, have some fun, tell some jokes or maybe post a video as we prepare for the weekend.

I will welcome anyone interested in guest posting or introducing yourself and any projects you may be working on. I just ask that you submit your posts to me by email at nanakoosa@yahoo.com with “guest post" in the subject line so I can review them before posting. If I have questions or concerns about content I will contact you as soon as I am able so we can discuss the issue and let you know when your post will be featured.  Post topics are not limited to recovery, surviving domestic violence or sexual assault.  Although a part of my mission is to empower and support survivors, we all have a "past", by the time we reach mid life we have all struggled at one time or another and we have all overcome challenges.   Even if you are a survivor or in recovery, don't feel you have to limit yourself to those experiences. Having said that, do be aware as readers that many women are interested in sharing their stories of survival and recovery which can be upsetting or triggering.  In respect to that I will indicate in the headline if the story of that nature.

My next step is to compile a mailing list for a monthly newsletter! If you would like to add your name to the mailing send an email and I’ll sign you up.

I want to thank everyone who has volunteered to contribute, and everyone who has been reading my blog faithfully as I’ve negotiated my way through getting my “cyber legs” in the past year. Your words and support are golden!

Peace,

Jenny

© 2011 Nanakoosa’s Place, authored by Jennifer Hazard

Charlie Sheen is Irrelevant

Um, ok, Charlie Sheen: f@#k him, who gives a f@#k what some spoiled moron does with his life He has no power or significance he's a distraction from the real problems in this country, let him have his damn fantasy life, it keeps him out of the way of real life, rather than keeping us out of real life...wake up folks there's a revolution brewing, and it may be for real this time. (No offense to my Sheen watching friends)
Readers, I'm going a little rogue for a bit.  Normally I plan out my blog topics, think them through, do some editing. Sometimes I'll veer from my intended course to respond to a recent news event of something that impacts my community or family; but i usually make an effort to relate the post to my mission and to my intended audience. In the next few days, weeks, however long it takes, I will most likely be posting more frequent, probably more brief, entries. And believe me, the issue I will be covering, namely the incredibly united and dedicated resistance to the radical changes that the very wealthy are attempting to enact, is a shining example of my Dream and Mission in action.  
I'd like to present my readers with a few tips

• don't rely on mainstream media for your information, they are NOT accurately (not even remotely accurately) reporting what is going on here in Wisconsin and all over the country
• after you check out some of the alternative sources (links below), take a moment to sit with your reactions. What are your gut feelings? I say this because it is NOT my intention to force my views upon anyone. I will present facts and information which may not be available elsewhere.
• Take some time to review your core values, ethics and principles, aside from any media input. How do they relate to what you see on the news, all sources of news.
• If you are inspired by the Unity and Solidarity you see in citizens response to things like Gov. Walker and many other governors attempts to slash collective bargaining rights, funds for education and healthcare while allowing enormous tax breaks for the wealthy, including out of state interests, I encourage you to take action. You may wonder what you can do, you may feel powerless. You are not,
• Discuss these issues with your friends and neighbors
• Educate yourself so you are well informed and equipped to engage in discussion.
• Make a poster, hang it in your window
• Write a letter to your representatives. Important tip, the reps who support unions and labor, working families and the poor, don't need convincing, they need encouragement and thanks. Pleas for reconsideration and review of dangerous policy are best sent to any representative who may be wavering in their support of these measures. There are republicans who are questioning the ethics of these proposals.
• Please feel free to contact me, either by leaving a comment or by sending an email to nanakoosa@yahoo.com
• I will be updating my Facebook status with news and events at various points throughout the day http://www.facebook.com/nanakoosa

And Please know, you are free to disagree...that is the beauty of the Freedom and Democracy we are fighting for.
In Peace and Solidarity,
Jenny

links:
http://www.truthout.org
http://pol.moveon.org/
http://www.democracynow.org/

My life on film, er, pixels

the Tat, wish #2

A couple of years back when my last boyfriend/ man friend and I separated due to "creative differences" he got custody of the "good camera". By "good" I mean, not disposable, and it isn't pink with Hello Kitty emblazoned all over it. When I got my tax return last year my tax guy (like I have 'people', lol) pretty much told me that this was the last year I was going to rake it in on all the deductions my single Mom status with a low paying job and excessive student loans had previously bestowed upon me once a year. I figured I'd better make this last run a good one. I did take care of some debt and other responsibilities, gave my kids spending money and bought my Granddaughters some clothes, but I had promised myself this time I was granting 3 of my own wishes..and lo and behold I did.
My 3 wishes were: a new laptop, a new tattoo and a "good" camera. The laptop has been well worth the investment.  I am able to sit in privacy and write, email, blog or check in on facebook gossip. The tattoo is pretty badass and represents my courage as a survivor. The camera has just been plain fun. It's one of those cute little colorful things that we see Ashton Kucher gliding around cocktail parties sneaking pics of attractive young women who pretend not to notice. So logically since this pretty boy can use it successfully, so can I. Well I can now after some trial and error (heavy on  the error side) and after actually resorting to reading an instruction or two. So now my latest project, or addition to my ongoing project of telling my story, recording my life as a Middle Aged, Unemployed, Hep C infected, recovering alcoholic, Master's Degree having dedicated Advocate, mother of 3, grandmother of 2, rescuer of stray animals trying to survive on a meager Social Security Disability at least until I can create some additional income, is to photo document  some of the days in my life.
 I just started today, officially on my bus ride to the bank, the grocery store and back home; a trip that with a car would've taken about an hour at most, but took close to 3 hours. But not to worry I promise it's not going to be some 21st Century version of 'Christmas in Appalachia". On the contrary I've been spotting sights that if I were clipping down the street at 35 or 40 mph I would never have noticed. The project is new and in the works and I haven't decided what, if anything, to do with it. I will probably include a pic or two with captions on my blog just to try it out, get some feedback and probably have some laughs, just as soon as I find that battery charger.
Peace,
Nanakoosa
© 2010 Nanakoosa’s Place, authored by Jennifer Hazard

Finding your style, and running with it

The initial stages of my blogging experience involved a lot of trial and error and experimentation. I felt like an explorer with a partial map, discovering new paths, new tricks new avenues; it’s been fun most times, frustrating at others.
Like any other social situation we are new to, we enter cautiously, careful not to offend anyone, trying to make a good impression. So we continue to write, we force our friends and family to read our posts, anxiously awaiting feedback (and hoping its positive enough to keep us going).
Then one day we sit down to write, maybe one of those days were feeling a little sassy, and we realize we are no longer “company’ or the new kid in class who has to maintain face.
We develop this comfort level with experience; a little feedback helps too, (hint, hint)
Now we feel free to open up a little more about our personal lives. We bring things down to a real level.
Depending on the type of blog you write and your intended audience, self-disclosure and daily observations may be the primary focus of your writing and will come quite naturally. If your blog is intended to be more informational and educational, you may rarely self disclose, if at all. I’ve seen blogs intended to promote business that run the gamut from “strictly business” to shameless self promotion.
I’ve found myself using more discernment and seeking balance between telling my story, and promoting my mission to unite survivors to advocate for themselves and other survivors.
I’ve decided that in order to be true to my mission I have to let the “wild woman” Jenny out to speak her truth, along with the Professional Jenny who is has the clinical and community resource knowledge to assist survivors. As I reflect on my original intention I’m finding that it is the Survivor/ “Wild Woman” whose voice is most relevant. She is the one with the most courage, the most moxie, with the most important stories to tell and the most capability for empathy.
It is also exciting that this transformation that is occurring during that point in my life where I’m finally reaching the age where I have more confidence, bigger perspective and less concern for what others think of me. How liberating for a woman who was anxious and socially phobic literally for as long as I can remember. So here I am a sassy middle aged survivor with experience, opinions and ideas just begging to be shared.
I’m putting out the call to all sassy middle aged women “with a history” to come together, share our knowledge and experience, humor, antics, irreverence and who knows maybe pave bold path for our daughters, granddaughters and all the young women who will follow.
Peace and Solidarity,
Nanakoosa







© 2010 Nanakoosa’s Place, authored by Jennifer Hazard