Fabulous Friday!!!!!

Headline: Spacey Hippie Grandma braves technological challenge-wins!
What a relief, after over a week with no laptop, communicating from my phone and my aging laptop which has no keyboard, I finally took the daring adventure into "Safe Mode". Such a funny name because to me it always felt like a very UN-safe mode...I expected the journey to be something like venturing into a dark cave with only a birthday candle for light.
The temporary loss of my beloved laptop gave me an opportunity to evaluate certain areas of my life. I spend a significant amount of time online, some of it productive, some creative and some just silly. I realized that at times I neglect other areas of my life, areas that expand my creativity and are essential to living a somewhat balanced life. I spent more time drawing, crafting, walking and played some board games.
Another issue that came up was my commitment to a non-mainstream lifestyle. I live on very little money and at this point in my life and our nation's history I rather prefer to keep it that way. I don't have savings or credit cards and much of my "commerce" is via the barter system or making/producing many of my own goods. That means when something breaks I can't just hop in my car (don't have one) and zip over to the Mega Media Mart, drop off my computer and come back later with my shiny credit card to pay the stranger that fixed it. So while I was asking around and waiting for a repair person who would be willing to barter, I reflected on concepts like community and time. The car/credit card/ Mega Mart method would have saved a great deal of time...and personal involvement. My method required me to network, talking to real actual people who then went and talked to real actual people. While this was going on, I took the time to read instructions to actually learn some things about my computer and took chances by trial and error.
It has occurred to me that most people are spoiled by convenience, having a car that tells you where to go rather than having to use your own problem solving skills and enjoy the adventure of getting lost and discovering new territory. If something "breaks", people throw it away. I had a friend who was about to throw away her vacuum cleaner; I looked at it and discovered a broken belt and a beater that was tangled with hair. In 20 minutes I repaired and cleaned the vac and saved her the 160 dollars it would have cost her to replace it, and saved a small piece of landfill.
There are many small actions we can take that combined and applied consistently can make our lives more sustainable, reduce our dependence of corporation that care nothing for our health and safety and help encourage others to follow our lead. The one certain thing is, we can't continue living with the instant gratifying, disposable, self absorbed patterns that have impacted our planet, our economy and our freedom.
What steps can you take, or have taken to humanize your community? I'd love to hear your stories!



© 2011 Nanakoosa’s Place, authored by Jennifer Hazard

The "perfect body"

The “perfect body”

What image comes to mind upon hearing that phrase..."the perfect body"? Remember in the 70's Bo Derek was a "10", in the 80's, well I'm not sure what the heck was going on there but a lot of people were into aerobics, jazzercise and fitness gurus. In the last couple of decades things have improved...slightly, slowly. Among my daughters' generation it is desirable to have “booty", a nice big juicy butt. This is good because many women carry their weight in their hips, thighs and butt unlike the androgynous teenage boy look that was sold to us in the 60's and 70's. But to have a look or body type become "vogue" is precisely the problem. It's hard enough keeping up with wardrobe style changes (I don't even bother) but body type changes? Hah. If thin is in, thick is out, if thick is slick thin is out; meanwhile as the trends change we all living in the body genetics gave us.
Much has been written, discussed and filmed to address the impact of the media (especially advertising) on women’s self image. It's not breaking news that many of us, especially younger women compare ourselves to an unrealistic ideal. When I was a teenager and into my early 20's it didn't even occur to me that the bouncy curls and wild waves that adorned women’s' crowns were actually permed, styled, sprayed, teased and otherwise cajoled into looking that way. I honestly thought that was how they looked naturally. My own hair was fine, straight and would not hold a curl no matter how hard I tried. I actually cried one night because my boyfriend was flirting with a "Big Hair" girl. And the worst part was it never occurred to me at the moment that any man shallow enough to choose one woman over another based hair volume was probably not someone I'd want to be with anyway.
Now getting "older" and having sustained a certain amount of wear and tear, I am extremely grateful that I got the deadly sin of envy out of my frame of reference. We are pressured to look a certain way when we are young, and as we age we are pressured to maintain that ideal which isn't even realistic for a young woman much less a 50 year old who has had babies, fallen off motorcycles, washed hundreds of thousands of dishes and all the other experiences that can affect how we age.
Plastic surgery which began as a quirky trend utilized by celebrities has now become disturbingly commonplace. It’s not only the extremes of actual surgical alteration that is becoming normalized, If a woman resists dying her hair as it grays she is either "so brave" (a phrase often delivered condescendingly) or is simply seen as eccentric. Once again the "old hippie" stereotype is invoked to dismissively invalidate a woman’s conscious, self affirming choice.
On the flip side I would be a hypocrite if I condemned women who do choose to dye their hair, go to the gym to maintain that perfect tone, or even get some "work done". After all we’re talking about our bodies, our choice; Choice being the key issue. If a woman chooses this route because she can afford it and she does it for herself with self awareness and confidence, I say go to it. After all I have altered my body with tattoos, piercings and the occasional purple or blue dye job; but I have also come to appreciate and love the scars, the stretch marks and all the imperfections that each tells a chapter in my story. Does this mean I'm always happy when I look in the mirror? Hell no, I haven't transcended vanity, I'm only human. But I no longer allow those disappointments (I'm talking to you cellulite) to drive me to making obsessively poor choices including berating myself for not living up to some unrealistic Ideal.
This is a topic I'd like to follow up on, there's so much more to be said. In the meantime I'd love to hear my readers’ thoughts and experiences with body image: either in comments here or on my Facebook group (see link in sidebar) I'm also including a link to The Now Foundation’s "Love Your Body" campaign. They have some wonderful projects, especially those designed for college age women. I strongly encourage you to check out the link!
Peace...and Love your Body, it is your temple.
Jenny
© 2011 Nanakoosas Place, by Jennifer Hazard

"Murphy's Lie", falling shoes and other barriers to Happiness

We all know "Murphy" of "Murphy's Law". The law that states whatever can go wrong , will. It guards against undue optimism and enjoyment, reminds us not to be too happy or something bad might happen. And if we do happen to enjoy some success Murphy is standing behind us whispering in our ear.  Murphy is the Eyore, The Debbie Downer, the archetypal Sad Sack. He tells us to fear not only failure, but success as well, because after all, according to him it will all eventually turn out badly; inevitably the other shoe will fall.
Many people are familiar with this mind set, this legacy of overworked caution, but no one has perfected it more adeptly that children of Alcoholics, and with good reason.
Growing up with an alcoholic parent involves learning to negotiate ones way through a maze of mixed messages, to maintain balance on the fault line of shifting boundaries and to be able to become invisible when its safer than being seen, or heard.
One can only be invisible for so long before she begins to fade, the more parts of You that you hide, the less accessible they become. The more we fade, the less we believe that we need, or deserve. So naturally two things happen; our cloak of invisibility becomes a barrier that filters out not only the negative but everything else as well. We create an energetic block that prevents us from receiving Love, Prosperity and anything else pleasant that might come our way. If some amount of Love or good fortune sneaks it's way past out armor, we quickly recoil. "How did that get in here?!' as if a snake had slithered it's way under our bed. We are uncomfortable with it's presence, it frightens us because we don't quite know what to do with it. What we do know is how to sabotage it, one way or another, to make it go away so we can remain safe in our familiar belief system known as Murphy's Law. Like so many other lies society teaches us, we have incorporated it into our core set of beliefs so deeply that we don't even think to question it.

Once we begin to recognize Murphy's Law for what it is, the rusty old remains of an obsolete coping mechanism, we see that it is really Murphy's Lie.  Like any other step on the road to personal growth, health and recovery recognition and acknowledgement is the first step.  many will tell you the first step is the hardest, I don't know that's necessarily true, but I think it is the most disruptive. It rattles our cage, it challenges our inner Eyore, it throws us a little off balance. But once the cage stops rattling, and Eyore calms down and we get our "sea legs" we can begin the next stage of acceptance, we can stop judging ourselves and get down to the philosophy of "it is what it is, and it ain't what it ain't" and we are on the path that will eventually lead us to be able to accept being Happy when we are Happy to be in that Moment  not give a thought to Mopey Murphy and his proverbial falling shoe.

© 2010 Nanakoosa’s Place, authored by Jennifer Hazard